Today was hard. I'm not going to lie about that.
Obviously yesterday I found out that Kelvin wasn't going to be my partner, but I never expected to feel so devistated. Don't get me wrong, Paul is a very nice guy, but I feel like he is very shy and not so helpful to me when I need him. He will have conversations with the boys and not translate it for me. I'm constantly asking him what it is they are talking about. Yet, in our bible study time he stood outside of the circle and didn't really add anything. I'm just super frustrstated.
I miss Kelvin so much. Just imagine not getting to see your best friend for an entire year and then when you are finally reunited you can't even hang out. It's really just an awful feeling. I go and talk to him as much as I can but that was only about twice today for just a quick hello. I did get to dance with him though after all the kids left and we made our circle of all the counselors to sing. But what is even worse is that a wave of jealousy came over me today because he is somebody else's helper that I know and she gets to see how awesome he is and hang out with him which is all I want to do.
I guess I'm just really struggling with how different everything is this year. Honestly if it weren't for jodi I'm pretty sure I would have broken down already.
I just pray that tomorrow and the rest of the week starts looking up.
I did get 11 of my 15 boys from last year so that is really really exciting! If you know the story of Joseph know now that his arms are healed and he is looking so good! One of my new boys, Gracious, is just adorable. I had one on one time with him today and he really opened up which is surprising for the first day. I wish they knew more english or I more Nyanja. But I am loving the fact that I get to see them again!
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KAILEE!!!!! I know it's hard. Three years in a row of new partners for me was super weird. If you see Toliwe Banda, Bertha Mukubesa, Paul Bwalya or Ruth Nyirenda, please give them hugs for me!!! They were my partners the past few years :) I don't know if you will run into any of my boys from Kaunda Square or my girls from Lookout School, but if you do, please also send them my love from Auntie Gracie!!!! And that I miss them so much and am so sad I could not be there!!! :) I am praying for the Lord to give you a supernatural strength these few weeks as you battle Satan and shower the kids with love and mercy from Daddy in heaven. Love you so much!!!! Grace :)
ReplyDeleteKailee, I am down on my knees and lifting you up in prayer. Give God your frustrations and He will carry you through. I love you xoxoxoxo
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